What can grandparents do to pass on the faith to grandchildren?

This is a question that older people often ask themselves when their children, who have become parents and have been baptized and initiated into the Catholic faith, do not pass on these teachings to their grandchildren.

Behind this act is usually hidden - among many other factors - the personal failure of children to take the step from a childish faith to an adult faith - assumed, internalized and matured - which has probably pierced at some point in them, but which is currently asleep.

It therefore seems necessary and desirable that, while children are questioning their own convictions, grandparents should intervene in this educational process, which is so important for the proper development of their grandchildren's personality and their future happiness. But how can this be done without it being seen as an interference by their children?

It is imperative that everyone finds the most appropriate answer to his particular case, considers the best way to do so and, if necessary, seeks the help of a person who can advise. However, the following points seem necessary:

a) First of all, grandparents must be consistent between their faith and their life, that is, between what they say and what they do.

b) Today the faith of the coalman is not enough; it will therefore be necessary to deepen it in order to give it a good foundation and have solid arguments to be able to explain to others what we believe, and why we believe.

c) Love moves mountains. If the children themselves feel loved, they will understand that it is the love of grandchildren that drives grandparents to "meddle" in religious education.

d) Haste, urgency and insistence are not the most appropriate methods. It is important to be careful to seize the most opportune moment to speak with our children and offer our help in this task.

It is very important that grandparents understand what educational processes look like, what are the different stages that a person must go through and what role should be played at each moment as the head of the family.

Educational processes are accompanied by different stages during which the person learns, internalizes, accepts or not, what has been learned, and gradually forges his own personality, becoming the person he decides to be by himself, and when the process is completed, it must be respected.

In the family, the father and mother begin by being responsible for education, later becoming the older generation, with other different but no less important skills, so that the education itself would belong exclusively to the parents and the complement of this education could be the responsibility of the older generation, that is, the grandparents. It is therefore in this context that grandparents can have a more than justified authority to bring their "little stone" in the transmission of the faith to their grandchildren.

Some grandparents who have made the effort not only to educate but also to give an example of life and who know how to respect their children by remaining in their rightful place, are in optimal conditions to, with the consent of the family, transmit the faith. If there is no consent, grandparents must not forget what has already been said: there is a time to educate and a time to respect. So can grandparents do nothing? Yes, Yes, and not just a little. They can pray, offer to God what they do not succeed because God can do everything.

Fina Pérez Sánchez-Osorio

Parish of Santa Catalina de Alejandría (Madrid)

Extract from the newspaper "Tres pilares” N°222 of Vida Ascendente Spain